Writing

Newspapers (Online and Otherwise)

The Commercial Appeal

Dispatches from a Memphis Snow Bunker

Don’t Fret Holiday Chit-Chat; Just Find a Narcissist

The Daily Memphian

Lines That Should Land Me a Job on “Bluff City Law”

Redeye Chicago

How to Maintain Your Sanity for the Last Few Days of This Election (also published at Second City Network)

Humor and Satire

The Establishment

MFM: White Evangelicals Seeking New Messiah

How Pants Work

What Your Favorite Celebrities Look Like Now (No Pictures)!

Is it OK if I Wear My Overalls to Bible Study?

I’m a Real Marketing Person, and I Can Prove it With These Creative Names I’ve Given Everyday Items

Quiz: Real Band or Just Letters?

12 Country Songs Memorializing Made-up Tragedies

You Guys are Doing a Great Job: An Open Letter from the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit

You’re Invited to Rhonda’s Bereavement Party!

Points in Case

A Guide to Determining Whether You Should Take Your Child to the Emergency Room

Robot Butt

10 Actors Who Became Famous for Roles that Don Knotts Turned Down

All the New Reasons Why Members of the Press Can be Banned from the White House

The 15 Best Nicknames in NFL History that Were Inspired by Sylvia Plath

In Memoriam: Those We’ve Lost to Make Paul Manafort’s Belongings

Let’s Make This Go Viral: A Man with Dementia Writes a Touching Letter to His Family

An Updated Look at Trump’s Leaked “To Oppose” List

With Everything That’s Happening Right Now, I’d Like to Announce I’m Selling Diet Pills

My Valentine’s Day Memory of a Forbidden Love

A Rap/Hip-Hop Compilation Recorded for the Trump Inauguration

There are Plenty of Things We Can All Come Together to Hate

When is it Appropriate to Respond with D-Generation X’s “Suck-It” Move?

10 More Claims Bill O’Reilly Has Made About Slaves

Second City Network

An Op-Ed by Tony Romo: I Look Forward to the Many Injuries Awaiting Me as a Broadcaster

The American Family Association’s Updated List of Unforgivable Disney Offenses

An Op-Ed by Parson Brown: The Constant Comparison to a Snowman is Really Hurtful

How to Maintain Your Sanity for the Last Few Days of This Election

Slackjaw

I am the Suburban Woman Who Ordered on the Starbucks App, and You are All Beneath Me!

Valentine’s Day Alternatives for Singles

Advice for my Son on Becoming a Man

These 12 Words Will Seem Dirty When You Read Them from Now On

The Weekly Humorist

The Shocking Results of Our Most Recent Independent Studies (Sponsored by Coca-Cola)

My Signed Book Collection (co-authored by Erik Sternberger)

Please Review the GOP-Approved Activities for Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

Letters Smuggled Out From the Front Lines of Amazon’s Never-Ending Holiday Sale (co-authored by Erik Sternberger)

What to Watch for at Billy Beckham’s Long-Awaited Funeral Service