This piece originally appeared at Slackjaw on Medium here: I am the Suburban Woman Who Ordered on the Starbucks App, and You are All Beneath Me! Fools in the Starbucks line hear me! See me! Remember this face, for it is the face of efficiency. It is the face of planning — of thinking ahead. … Continue reading I am the Suburban Woman Who Ordered on the Starbucks App, and You are All Beneath Me!
This piece originally appeared in Slackjaw on Medium here: Valentine's Day Alternatives for Singles Galentine’s Get together with the girls, pop open a bottle of wine, and spend the evening talking about work, love, and life. Palentine’s Hang out with the boys, get good and drunk, and say things like, “You know? We’re friends. You know … Continue reading Valentine’s Day Alternatives for Singles
This piece originally appeared on Slackjaw here: Advice for My Son on Becoming a Man Always stand when a lady enters a room, and never sit back down. “Like” everything you can on Facebook. There may come a time when you can’t. Don’t blink. Ever. Linus didn’t need that blanket. Always take your phone in the … Continue reading Advice for My Son on Becoming a Man
This piece originally appeared on Slackjaw here: These 12 Words Will Seem Dirty When You Read Them From Now On Squint Pump Thwart Bunt Gimp Cusp Jinx Squat Qualm Fist Beef Jazz